The pause - peri & meno

I wish I’d seen this 10 years ago

I’ve just watched Robyn Malcolm: Menopause and Us on TVNZ, and I really wanted to share it with you.

At 48, and having experienced perimenopause for a number of years now, I found myself nodding along, reflecting, and thinking:

I wish I’d known this 10 years ago.

What I really appreciated about this documentary was seeing Robyn Malcolm — someone so recognisable to most Kiwi women — openly share her own experience and then create space for other women to talk about theirs.

Because for far too long, menopause hasn’t really been talked about.

And when women have experienced changes in their mood, sleep, energy, memory, anxiety, confidence, relationships, bodies and mental health, how often have those experiences been looked at separately?

Stress.

Anxiety.

Depression.

Burnout.

Not coping.

Feeling like you're losing yourself.

Being told it’s just part of getting older.

Or perhaps wondering, “What the hell is happening to me?”

The documentary highlights how many women have spent years trying to understand symptoms without necessarily realising that perimenopause and menopause could be playing a significant role.

And I think that conversation is incredibly important.

Not because menopause explains everything. It doesn’t.

But because women deserve to have the information to understand what is happening in their own bodies, so they can ask questions, seek appropriate support and make informed choices about their wellbeing.

For me, one of the most powerful parts of this stage of life has been recognising just how interconnected everything is.

Our physical health, emotional wellbeing, stress response, relationships, identity, sleep, energy and sense of self don't exist in separate little boxes.

And when our bodies are going through significant hormonal changes, it makes sense that we might experience changes across many areas of our lives.

I think about the younger women coming through now and how different their experience could be if they grew up understanding that this is something their bodies may go through. Rather than reaching their 40s and wondering why they suddenly don't feel like themselves anymore.

I wish I’d had that information at 38.

So I’m sharing this documentary because I think it’s a conversation worth having.

If you’re in your 40s or 50s, perhaps you’ll recognise some of your own experience.

If you’re younger, perhaps it will give you some understanding of what may lie ahead.

And if you love a woman who is going through this stage of life, perhaps it will help you understand her a little differently too.

Menopause isn’t something women need to quietly endure.

It’s a stage of life that deserves conversation, understanding, support and choice.

And perhaps most importantly, we need to stop making women feel like they are somehow failing when their bodies and lives are changing.

So, go and watch it.

I’d love to know what you think.

"Watch Robyn Malcolm: Menopause and Us on TVNZ+" (https://www.tvnz.co.nz/)